The Plight of Women Is News... at Last

I wept when I read the story Saving the World's Women and others published in the special section of The New York Times Magazine this weekend.

I cried not because the stories are so terribly sad, which they are; not because of the heartfelt response by other countries, which is fantastic; and not because it was the first time I had learned about the plight of these women and girls, because it wasn't; but because a major newspaper is finally covering women's issues as a serious problem that we can't just accept as status quo anymore. Because The New York Times is reporting that sexual slavery, rape as a tool of warfare, marrying off 12-year-old girls who are raped and then die in childbirth, honor killings, and genital mutilation are horrifying truths for millions of women around the world, to say nothing of the financial subjugation and lack of education that keep women "in their place."

I wept because I felt the kind of heart-jumping-out-of-my-chest elation that I felt when Barack Obama was elected president: joy, relief, gratitude, and restoration of my faith in humanity. Thank you to all of the journalists and authors who participated and made women's issues news worth reporting.

I promise to do my part by volunteering for organizations that address women's and girls' issues. I pledge to make a difference in one girl's life by sticking by her and showing her that there are options beyond pregnancy and dropping out of school at 15 or 16.

What can you do, what can you pledge, to keep the momentum going?

Completely Unscientific Research

OK, so I've spent the last week talking to various people about this male-female communication thing, and there are, as you might imagine, as many opinions as there are people. Some posit that communication is not really gender based. Hmmm... Methinks these are people who have not been subjected to much discrimination. You figure out who they are. Others say that they, like me, have suffered negative consequences for behaving and/or communicating in ways not in keeping with their gender stereotypes.

At a recent networking function, I asked a high-level executive from a certain utilities company what top three tips she could give regarding successful communication with men in the workplace:

1. Be logical. Take your audience and your thought process from Point A to Point B to Point C. (Point taken.)

2. Don't just announce a decision. Bring them into the decision-making process. Give them the space to make them think it's their idea, and then approve it. (I think you have to bring people into the decision-making process regardless of gender, but apparently she thought this was especially important with men.)

3. Limit chit-chat. If you must chit-chat, talk about what's interesting to them. (That last part is true of all audiences.)

I'll also share an idea from another wise female colleague that I've heard from other sources before. Most men are problem solvers. They immediately go into problem-solving mode when you talk to them. So, take advantage of that by saying something like, "I have a problem, and I need your advice. Could we meet for lunch this week?" The consensus is that no man will turn down a meeting with you when approached this way.